Exercise is the BEST Medicine

It has taken two months, holidays, travel, moving and countless disappointments for me to finally sit and breathe. No, the yoga classes just made me frustrated that I am inflexible, and re-enforced that inverted positions are hard. There was rejection to great attempts and classes to stave off boredom. Oh and don't forget the ever popular question of, "Have you tried e Harmony?" All this has left me exhausted emotionally. Thankfully, wow thought I would never say that, I have been through depression before. I am so thankful to be in Central Oregon where the sun shines and activities are just outside your door. I am thankful for friends that meet up for walks, drinks and dinner parties. I am thankful for my brother who let me tag along on a spelunking adventure and has been enthusiastic about dinner parties. And as frustrating as she is, I am thankful that my mother's willingness to always go art walk, dancing or xc-skiing. And thanks Dad for letting me stay.

Emotional Me= exhausted and disappointed

Below is an excerpt from a blog I really enjoyed today. It is about having "emotional intelligence." I really appreciate someone writing about this because I do not have the words to express why I cry. Click on the link to read the rest of the article.

How often do we, as a spiritual family, talk about how we feel about life, God, and ourselves? Not surface level chitchat, but the aches and the cries of our hearts?

We like generic terms: “I’m doing well” or “I’m struggling, but God is good.”

I like generic terms because saying “My heart feels like it’s being ripped to shreds by the injustice in the world and my gut says I need to do something about it, and I kind of want to throw up because my brain says I’m insane and is anxious about everything…” makes me sound a little unstable.

If I were to start cursing the day of my birth or ripping my clothes off to scream about current events, you’d have me committed for a psych evaluation. To some extent, I can’t say I’d blame you.

Sometimes we are overly dramatic. Sometimes our emotions do rule our life. Generally though, our emotions are more normal than we think.

There is a time and a season for every feeling from euphoria to rage to empty indifference. Unleashing those emotions is a natural part of human existence.

Not in an “I’m gonna unleash this can of whoop ass” professional WWE wrestling sort of way, but in a healthy “I’m going to allow myself to feel and then learn how to respond to what I’m feeling”  sort of way.

God Owes Me Nothing

 He loves to bless me though- smile!

Sarah's Birthday at Clear Lake

Walk in The Old Mill

Church as the United Nations

In my travels I have been blessed by the diversity of Church. The Orthodox and Catholic know how to inspire awe and show reverence for what demands respect. The Evangelicals welcome informality, allowing life and modern expression within their walls. And then there are the bible thumping types that remind us all where our source of knowledge, strength and truth come from.
In all we are together the Body of Christ, in our diversity we reflect His creation and glory. In our common desire of worship, we become the ordinary saints- extending love, grace, and resources. We are the humanitarians rallying the cause of injustice. Church do not stay divided, unite on the value of human life. Church do not become silent, you are needed.

Wonderful Winter

I am sitting here inside the kitchen nook looking out as the snow falls and holding a cup of tea. The aroma floating through the house is of freshly baked cookies. So, I have some sense of accomplishment as I sit to just watch. It has been a couple years since I have had snow at winter time and it is mesmerizing - funny how something so simple can be so captivating.

Glad to be Here

Walking home under the stars last night made me so happy. There was something peaceful about seeing the universe stretch through the depths pinpointed by small lights. The cold and quiet also encouraged this moment of peace and ponder.
Being back in Central Oregon, I have to remember to bundle up or hold a warm drink tight in my little hands. But even these necessities have become a delight. My culture has a sentimental value this year, and I am enjoying the sounds of the holiday and smells of mixed spices.
Other moments of quiet gladness for me this last month have been attending and exiting the cinema together as family, sitting next to a crackling fire, and hunting a Christmas tree in the softly falling snow. And Stillness is the warm embrace that I am glad to be here in.
Thank you God, Bend and family for wrapping me in warmth.
Merry Christmas!

Date with my Grandpa

 Today while looking for a box of cereal, I found a couple tins of sardines and and a box of hash-browns (the freeze dried kind that you can prepare super quick.) Both of these foods I love! -Not because they are particularly good, but more because they remind me of my grandfather. I was even more pleased to see these things hidden away because my grandmother hates them, but also kept them as a reminder of my Poppy.
When we were allowed to eat sardines, it was only because we were outside, where the fresh air would blow the smell away. My grandfather loved to rail my grandmother and would ask for a kiss following our smelly fish consumption. Hehehe
Tomorrow, if it is not raining, I think I'll sit on the back porch with my Poppy and enjoy the last tin. - It's a date!